Sweat...

So, for those of you that don't know me that well, I have to tell you that I sweat. A lot! I know this isn't the blog you were hoping to read (house!) but I felt the need to share. I've tried many avenues to stem off my ahem, problem but to no avail. I'm heading back to the dermatologists today to see if I can qualify for Botox treatments. Yes, I said Botox. Little injections under the arms that stop sweating for good. Unfortunately, it's a treatment that you have to do twice a year and I guess it's really expensive and insurance companies don't want to cover it. I've tried every other avenue that all led to dead ends with me still sweating like a pig. So my derm suggested that I write a letter to the insurance company to describe to them how hyperhydrosis (yes, it is an actual condition) affects my life. Here is my letter:

To Whom It May Concern.

The first time I was made painfully aware of the fact that I sweat excessively was in 6^th grade. We had just come back from Christmas vacation and I was resplendent in a new outfit: A camel colored silk shirt with ruffled collar and sleeves paired with an embroidered vest. Silk shirts were the thing to be wearing those days. I walked into my classroom, confident and feeling like one of the “popular” girls in my new “in” shirt. That is until I took off my jacket and one of the boys in my class shouted out, “Geez Danielle! Sweat much?” and everyone laughed. I looked down and saw that there were huge patches of what was once beautiful, creamy, camel colored silk turned dirt brown and cold under my armpits. Needless to say, after that, I was hyper aware of my hyperhydrosis!

It’s been over 15 years since that incident and now I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t constantly worried about my “condition.” When I go shopping for clothes, if I find a shirt that I actually like, the first thought that comes into my mind is “Will this show sweat?” If I’m unsure, I will surreptitiously lick (yes, I said lick!) the fabric to see if it will change color with moisture. If it doesn’t, I’ll buy it. If it does (and most of them do) it goes back on the rack and I try to find the same shirt in black or white.

I was the maid of honor at my best friend’s wedding a few years ago and I LOVE to dance. However, it’s hard to not look like a stereotypical “white boy (girl)” when your arms are clamped down by your sides because you can’t lift them up for fear that everyone is going to notice the half moons of stained fabric under your arms and not want to come near you for fear of being sprinkled with sweat!

It doesn’t matter if it’s hot or cold out, if I’m doing strenuous activity or just sitting quietly. I sweat. All. The. Time. It’s horribly embarrassing. When my husband and I were first dating, I used to travel over an hour to visit him for the weekend. When I left the house, I’d have tissues packed under my armpits so I wouldn’t stain my shirt and about halfway through my trip, I’d stop at a rest station, discard the wet tissues and replace them with new ones to get me the rest of the way there.

I’ve tried everything. Deodorants don’t do anything but make me smell nice. The store brand “prescription strength” antiperspirants didn’t make me sweat any less, and BONUS! they actually made me smell like B.O. I finally went to my PCP and he prescribed Hypercare. Well, that worked for about a week and then didn’t even though I followed the directions to the letter. Next step was Dermatology where they prescribed me Robinul.

Did I mention that I’m a nurse and that I work in a hospital? Do you have any idea how dry hospitals are to begin with. Add to that taking an anticholinergic and now I’m taking stock out in lubricating eye drops, constantly sucking on hard candy to keep my mouth moist, slathering on lotion like I’ve got alligator skin, but guess what? Still sweating through my undershirts and scrub tops. It doesn’t instill very much confidence with a patient when I’m going in their room to start an IV and I’m sweating like a pig as though this is the first time I’ve ever done this. It looks even worse when another nurse is calling me in the start an IV on their patient and here I come, in all my armpit stained glory and the patient is probably sitting in bed like “Seriously? She looks like she’s scared to death and I’m going to let her stick me with a hose of a needle?” It’s a good thing that I’m actually very good at IV’s.

This affects my life every day. I would love to be able to not worry about the color of my top in the summer. I would love not to have to wear an undershirt just to sop up some moisture before it hits my scrubs. I would love not having to stealthily check under my arms to see if I have any stains before lifting them to dance. I would love to be able to say “Sure Jay, I’ll toss a softball around with you” instead of “No, I really don’t want to right now” just because I don’t want to sweat through my shirt from minor athletic effort. But chances are, I’ve already sweat through it just sitting in the shade.

This isn’t about cosmetics it’s about functionality in my life. You’d never think that excessive sweating would be so debilitating, but it is. Physically and emotionally. This is a last resort for me so I am humbly putting myself out there in the hopes that you will see that I really do need this treatment and it would change things for me drastically.

Sincerely,

Danielle Wiesner

I have my fingers crossed that someone at United Health will sympathize with my plight and approve the treatments. If not, well, I guess I'll just continue to deal with it the way I have been. And wearing lots of black and white shirts.